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Exile was a big jolt for me
By Arjun Dev Majboor
Exile was a big jolt to me as
a writer. I had premonitions about it and had
penned the poem
'Neagrai' sometime before my
community's displacement.
'Neagrai'
is related to possible
displacement,
'Neagrai'
personifies
a Kashmiri Pandit in the
poem. In this I have tried to portray
how Kashmiri Pandit was
getting destabilised in Kashmir
and what was in store for him.
Originally, this poem was written
in Kashmiri and has been
translated now into Hindi and
English. There is another pre-migration
poem
'Samay' (Time), which indicates how situation
was turning hostile to Kashmiri
Pandits. The poem was later on
translated into Hindi by Prof. C.L. Sapru. This poem was written in
a specific context. Communalization
was fast gripping the
mind of Kashmiris.
'Nai Duniya' was publishing vitriolic material
to deepen the communal schism.
As a politically aware writer I
would often talk to the members
of my community about the fast
changing situation, where nobody
was resisting the retrograde
forces.
Even secular elements amongst the majority community were getting communalized, though some of them couldn't comprehend the deeper forces at work.
Gradually, I came
to know about elements raising
donations and sending Kashmiri
Youth across for training in subversion.
In December 1989 as the
government was found wanting
in providing protection to the
Pandit minority I was suggested
to leave Zainapora Kashmir, for
the time being by late Moti Lal
Saqi as conditions were not
good.
In November 1989 I had an
occasion to meet Muslim
biradari of my village in
Zainapora. Snowfall had already
taken place. The occasion was
the condolence function of a villager,
belonging to the majority
community. The villagers asked
about my assessment of the situation.
I replied," Hard times are
coming for all of us. If you feel
by forcing Kashmiri Pandits out
from Kashmir you will get Pakistan
you tell us frankly so that
we can go elsewhere". The Villagers
said that they were not for
Pakistan. However, I could not
restrain from warning them "If
the gun comes in the peaceful
state, it will not leave anybody
untouched. It will torment you
as well as us". Some boys from
Zainapora too went across to
Pakistan. I have no further details
about the impact of militancy
in Zainapora.
My family already had a
house at Udhampur. It was December
1989. There was extreme
fear and insecurity among
Kashmiri Pandits. Anantnag and
Bijbehara reeled under curfew. I
contacted a taxi driver from
Bijbehara. He was known to me
and gave me an assurance that
he would come to Zainapora after
four days. Meanwhile, I
packed some of my books and
few clothes. When I asked my
family members to prepare
for going to Jammu
they thought I was joking.
No migration had
taken place from
Zainapora as yet.
The taxi driver
dropped in one evening
and gave one hour to get
ready. He had to visit a
Pandit family in another
village in similar connection.
My daughter Kiran
had given birth to a baby
recently. We were keen
to take her out because
of unreliable medical facilities.
She had journeyed
from Fatehpur to
Zainapora, partly on foot
and partly by Tonga, for
many days motorized
transport had virtually
come to halt. The driver
had fixed Rs 600 as fare
for three of us-myself,
my wife and daughter.
The driver had to pick up
another passenger-a
non Pandit from
Bijbehara.
It was at 9 PM we left
Zainapora. As the Taxi
prepared to leave I looked towards
my house, the compound
and then starry sky with sorrow.
I had a feeling that this was going
to be my last glimpse of my
home and Zainapora, the village
where many generations of mine
had lived in freedom without any
fear.
At 1:30 AM we reached
Ramban. The Army Officer,
guarding the bridge asked the
driver to halt. A thorough search
of the vehicle was conducted. I
was asked where were we heading
for. I replied "Udhampur".
With no further questions we
were asked to go. The taxi broke
down at Batote. A car mechanic
was called for correcting the
fault. It was at 4 0' Clock in the
morning we touched Udhampur.
1st Visit:
Twelve years later I got an
opportunity to revisit the land
which was my own, belonged to
me and treasured my ethos, my
culture, my civilisation but had
been snatched from me. It was
2001. The occasion was a Culture
Meet. 14 Kashmiri Pandit
writers had to receive awards for
their work. Some came from
Delhi- Makhan Lal Bekas, Pran
Nath Jalali, Pran Kishore; while
others came from Jammu. The
award-giving ceremony took
place in Tagore Hall. Pran
Kishore released my book
Tehqiq.
There were other
programmes as well-cultural
programmes, Mushaira etc. I
strongly pleaded for acceptance
of Devnagri as alternate script
for Kashmiri and argued that it
was necessary for those who
could not learn Nastaliq. Only
few of the writers resident in
Kashmir talked about our displacement.
Kashmir had changed beyond
imagination. I and my writer
colleagues had gone in a taxi. We
saw people in thousands coming
out of mosques. Religiosity
was on increase. Ladies looked
pale due to stress. While passing
through Anantnag along the
highway i.e. new shopping complexes
and massive buildings
had come up, leaving little free
space in between. Architecture
too had undergone change. We
saw many new brick-kilns in
paddy land along Vessu-
Khanabal stretch that had come
up to meet the increased demand.
We were housed at Tourist
Reception Centre and visited
Tulmulla and Vicharnag. Rehman
Rahi, the well-known writer welcomed
us at his house in
Vicharnag. He narrated some stories
about militancy. Then he
took us to the famous historic
temple in the locality. The
guards allowed us in. The Pandit
mohalla looked devastated. Not
a single Pandit house was intact,
the damaged houses presented
an ugly look. Vicharnag, which
used to be a major centre for
Kashmiri Pandits now looked
like a locality smitten by ghosts.
IInd visit:
A year later I had to preside
over a mushaira organised by
Radio Kashmir at Srinagar. Director
AIR Mr. Zia was extremely
cordial and lavish in his hospitality,
attending to arrangements
even in minutest details.
This time we had opportunity
to visit the interior of the city-
Maharaja Bazar, Batmaloo, Karan
Nagar and Habbakadal. Tea
shops were not in good
order, little attention was
paid to cleanliness. We
were astonished to see
that beef was being sold
openly at Batmaloo.
This was a departure
from early
times. Batmaloo looked
more of a big market than
a bus stand. Shops and
markets had come up
everywhere, at many
places there was encroachment
even on the
main roads.
'Hogads' (Dried fish)
and 'Nadrus' (Lotus
stalks) brought me to
Habbakadal. Visiting old
Habbakadal bridge was
deeply nostalgic for me.
My thoughts went back
to the years before our
displacement when I
used to spend hours
conversing with my
friends and relations at
the historic bridge. In
those lovely times the
area reflected much life.
The Vitasta waters with
reflection of lights on it
from the houses on the two
banks used to present a majestic,
charming sight. All this had
come to an end. I could hardly
spot a Pandit-male or female here
in a place which used to be the
hub of Kashmiri Pandit community.
There was no life now. Only
few people were seen moving on
the bridge quietly. Houses
looked deserted, burnt and in
ruins. The famous painter Late
Bansi Parimu used to live here at
Safriyar. His house had been
demolished to make way for a
new Habbakadal bridge.
We also went to Nai Sarak
area. People lacked usual joviality
and conversed little with
strangers and others. People did
recognise us as Pandits.
Exile Poems:
Padasmayik,
(Footprints of
Time), written in Kavya style,
was published by me in 1992.
Violence and killings pained me,
cultural loss haunted me. In this
long poem two characters-
Sangur
(male) and
Sangarmal (female) interact. Through them
I relate Kashmir's history-from
early times to the times of displacement.
The first chapter
starts with portrayal of beginning
of displacement and the
situation in the immediate aftermath.
I have drawn a scene
where shops are closed and the
shopkeepers have left Kashmir,
with black moon having risen
over Kashmir. The poem is divided
into nine Sargas and runs
into 64 pages.
Tyol (Pangs)
This came out in 1995, and
bears deep imprint of Kalidas on
me. His style, use of similes and
vocabulary have impressed me
a great deal. I had also privilege
to do Kashmiri rendering of his
'Meghdoot' in 'Obre Schech'. In
place of cloud I substitute Swan as messenger. Speaking metaphorically
the Swan (Raj Hans)
is invested with powers to sift
truth from falsehood. I ask the
Swan to go to Kashmir to help
me know what was going on
there. And I promise to raise
decorative arches for him when
he would come back. The Swan
is provided topo-graphic details
to visit different places in time
and history. The bird is asked to
get message from megaliths-
(Shahmar Pal) e.g. Gufkral to
help Kashmiris come out of the
mess. I request the Swan to visit
my house in Zainapora. Finally,
the Swan reaches a deserted village,
buried under snow. A recently-
born baby had been
abandoned by some one there.
The baby expresses desire to
talk to Swan. The latter enquires
the baby about the identity of
his parents and the circumstances
of abandonment. The
Swan asks the baby', who are
such merciless parents which
have abandoned you in this
state? Who will cradle and sing
lullby songs to you? Who will
bring you up? I am pained to see
you in this state". The baby
states," I too am fed with the situation
in this land. Take me somewhere
where the abominable
snowman will rear me up and
eagles will bring sweet fruit for
me".
The poem exudes charm and
reflects nostalgia about the place
and the old ethos. The poem that
runs into 36 pages, has 8 line
stanzas in verses (Total 96
verses).
Impact of Exile:
Kashmir is in my blood. In my
writings I have raised questions why
we were forced into exile?
why fundamentalists are slaughtering
people? Why people are
being killed without any justification?
I strongly miss beauty and
nature of Kashmir. The delinking
of our rituals and culture from
its natural soil also pains me. As
writers we have lost the atmosphere
for writing. We have to
write in a milieu where Kashmir
is missing. There is no readership/
sale for our books. The
Jammu press has been quite
positive. Over twenty articles
have been published on me.
Source: Kashmir
Sentinel
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